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2002-10-14 - 5:35 a.m.

Back in 95-96 I kept a dream journal online, and was very much into lucid dreaming. I was very good at it, and wrote in the middle of the night, and had a bedside recorder. Actually, a videocam, but I would just record myself talking about the dreams, and then drift back into restless dreamstate. I quit doing the lucid dreaming thing, because I was getting no sleep.

Also the dreams weren't even sexual most of the time which was why I tried to figure out lucid dreaming in the first fucking place.

12 May (96)

In this dream, there was some kind of discussion outside this train station between these two little guys and it was getting quite heated. For some reason I felt like they were talking about me, so I was kind of uneasy. I wasn't ready for a freaky dream, so it was uncomfortable. Finally they walk over to me and ask me for help. Apparently they are being terrorized by somebody, and I'm the residential fly shooer.

We go to their village, which is in this little excavation, that is very jungle-like and oval in shape. I'd say the entire area is has a radius of about 60 yds. There are alot of trees and such, all with vines. Now I look behind me and there are about 100 of these natives, and we are all on this platform overlooking the village area. Everyone is quite loud, and boistrous, cheering and stuff.

I'm very calm now. This is like some sort of regular thing for me, saving villagers from ne'er do wells. I open up my briefcase and their is this really shiny steel suit with these tubing connection thingies, that appear to be some sort of hydraulic support mechanism. I put on the suit and it's very form fitting. It's a lovely golden, and it's got like jaguar markings on it. I put on my helmet and it's a 3/4 helmet that gives me a pretty good field of vision. I felt pretty good in that suit. Hell yeah, I did. I was like Jaguarman or something. Well apparently the purpose of the suit was to augment my physical abilities with skills similar to a jaguar. I can already feel the power surging through me, and lots of these natives are taken aback by my impressive armoured self.

I look down into the village area and I see my nemesis. It's this huge lion. Goddamn this thing was huge. He's darting back and fort, he sees me, and he's moving much too fast. Almost a blur. But very controlled, and he seems intelligent, so I make some sort of mental note about that. I'm very professional, as most Jaguarmen are.

Finally I come up with my gameplan. It's to tire out the lion by swinging on the vines back and forth over the village area, hoping that he will follow me and try to jump up at me. So I find a vine and I swoop down. It's working very well, and I can see the natives all lined up around the walls of the village. There's alot of hoopla and people are pretty excited about the whole thing.

Well, my swinging back and forth on the vines trick is working then all of a sudden I start to lose momentum and he's getting awfully close to me when he's lunging at me from the ground. So that was scary. Finally I run out of steam on this little platform above this one building in the village and the lion can reach me and he leaps up to me and starts trying to bite me. So I reach into his mouth, and his teeth see, they are like the prongs of a fork, and very smooth and thin, and I begin pushing them back into his gums, and they are going back in pretty readily, so that's encouraging. The only thing is, as quickly as I am shoving his teeth into his gums, they are growing back downward. So I do a front flip over the lion and I start to take off into the jungle and hide, but he's on me in about 4 seconds. I use my enhanced jaguar attributes to avoid him, and that's good because he's pissed by now. Finally I do this tumble move and I grab this vine in mid-air after coming out of the tumble, and I fly up to this other platform at the end of the village and on the platform is three pie pans that are spinning on these sterno type burners.

Well, no they are more like stove burners. Well these pie pans are pretty damn big, let me tell you. The pie pans are filled with 1/2 melted butter and spinning at a moderate speed. There are spotlights over the pie pans. Well I jump up into the pie pans and take off my armor and I'm just in my underwear and I see the lion coming my direction. So, I start doing this really slow and provocative dance in this butter filled piepan.

My intent being to make the lion believe that I wasn't the guy in the Jaguar Armor Suit.

Well those of you who know me, are probably pretty disgusted with the whole idea of me dancing in my underwear in a pan of butter, so I apologize for that.

But that lion, he took off like a dog all whimpering like he got spanked...and everyone in the village was pretty happy about that, all whooping and hollering.

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